Five Worst 76ers Items at the New Era Team Store
The 76ers are on fire and it’s the Holiday Season. Tis the season to buy gifts for friends and loved ones so it’s natural that people are probably buying 76ers related gifts for one another. Where better to buy a 76ers item than the New Era Team Store at Wells Fargo Center? Their prices are high, but the selection is abundant. There are great items in the shop, buy there are also some clunkers to avoid. Here are the five worst 76ers items at the New Era Team Store.
1. 76ers Hockey Jersey $134.99
No. Just no. We don’t need to be crossing sports. Hockey is good. Basketball is good. No reason to cross-pollinate. Do you wear bowling shoes to play baseball? Of course not. Same deal here.
This makes no sense and the price is outrageous. This one is called the Royal Ontario Lacer Hood. Is that a Canadian connection? Even worse. What the hell does this have to do with the Sixers or basketball? If you’re buying this, you might as well bring your baseball glove to an Eagles game.
2. 76ers Beaver $19.99
An officially licensed stuffed 76ers Teddy Bear? Sure. Sign me up. Nothing wrong with a solid American classic like a teddy bear. An official licensed stuffed 76ers beaver (HEY NOW!!!)??? GTFO.
Did someone get a deal on the stuffed beavers from the Beaver College bookstore before the name change to Arcadia and figure they could just shove a 76ers embroidered star in its paws? That’s enough stuffed beaver talk. Don’t buy this. Again, nonsensical.
3. Brotherly Love Hat $24.99
Why is this in the Sixers Team Store? Someone puts a circle of stars on the side of a hat and suddenly it’s a 76ers hat? I love the Brother Love moniker for Philadelphia, but this is a Philly hat not a Sixers hat.
This hat belongs in Old City at one of those souvenir shops that sells cheap t-shirts, hats, magnets and snow globes. In fact, you can probably get a similar hat at those stores for half the price.
Why is it Green?
4. Dreamcatcher Earrings 14.99
Cultural appropriation anyone? Haven’t we shit on Native Americans enough? Do we have to cheapen and mass produce an item that is sometimes sacred in some Native American tribes. This isn’t even a dreamcatcher in the sense that a hard plastic/metal 76ers basketball is where the woven net or web should be. They seriously just hung some beaded fringe off the balls and called it a dreamcatcher. If these are dangling from your ears, you’re basically saying “I’m an ignorant asshat.” Shame on the NBA for even licensing this offensive junk.
5. Backboard Glasses 4.99
Game shades? First of all, they aren’t shades. They’re glasses. These aren’t blocking out any UV or fluorescent lights. Where would anyone wear these? Walk into a bar or party with a pair of these on and you’re begging people to throw things at your face. Where is the net???
Found the net. The first ones were defects. These are still ridiculously bad, even with the net. However, at $4.99 they are one of the more reasonably priced items. Still, we suggest you avoid. I mean, if they don’t look good on me, they aren’t looking good on anyone. Newsflash, they don’t look good on me.
We did find one item that makes a good stocking stuffer. GRITTY GLASSES!
